Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Snip Snip...

Isaiah finally had his surgery yesterday to finish his circumcision. He is 6 months old.

When he was just under 2 weeks old we had a scheduled appointment with the Family doctor, here in Belding, to have him circumcised under Dan's wishes.
To make a long story short... the completely unorganized doctor began the procedure only to stop halfway through to inform us that he did not have the proper tools to finish the job. With tears rolling down my face, and my poor newborn screaming at the top of his lungs he proceeded to tell us that he would order the correct tools and would see us the next week for a follow-up appointment. It was awful, to say the least! I still question whether he had any heart in him at all! To begin with, no mother wants to see their baby completely strapped down, and cut like that for no good reason! I could go on and on about how horrible it was... but i'll fast forward a bit.

I quickly found a new doctor, whom i like very much. He referred us to a Urologic Consultant... who refers to himself as the "Penis R' Us"  :-)
We had a consultation, a Pre-Op, and finally his surgery. In all, It went very well. The doctors and nurses were all very thorough, and left us with absolutely no questions unanswered. We were a bit rushed because there was a cancellation before us, so they wanted us in as soon as possible. After meeting with the Nurse, Nurse's assistant, Doctor, Surgeon, Surgeon's assistant, and finally the Anesthesiologist I finally had to hand Isaiah over. Most unknown faces tend to make Isaiah uncomfortable and quite sensitive. His eyes turn all red, he puffs out his cheeks, gets the biggest pouty lip, and finally breaks into the saddest little cry.
With my hands a bit trembly I gave my baby a kiss, and handed him over to the Anesthesiologist. It is not often that i am away from Isaiah, and not at all with him in a strangers hands. I kept my smile and tried to make Isaiah feel as if it was completely normal. As they started walking down the hallway Isaiah kept his eyes locked on me, and then finally looked away when he was kissed on the cheek by his carrier. What a brave little boy, i am so proud of him! I thought I would keep it together, but as soon as I stepped out of the waiting room I burst into tears.

(I have a lot of respect for women who have to do this with their children on a weekly and sometimes daily basis. They have so much strength to be constantly torn like that. I pray to God that I never have to go through those kinds of trials.)

They put Isaiah out, gave him an IV and a breathing tube. :-(  Oh. how i am not a big fan of hospitals.
I was hoping that they would bring me back before he woke up, but sadly they didn't. I could hear him crying as soon as we went into the recovery room. It was a room full of patients lying in their beds. Poor Isaiah had drowned them all out with his cries. The nurse was holding him and trying to calm him down. She handed him to me, and he was completely overwhelmed, in pain.... i had yet to see him in that distraught of a state. My heart broke.  After he refused to breast feed they gave him some Morphine to get him to relax.
I held him for a long time, and they continued to monitor him. We moved to another room, and i fed him some Glucose water so that he would start to come-to. They encouraged me not to breast feed him because it might make him sick, so i had to pump. After a long day, some very hungry bellies and tired eyes, they removed his IV and monitor, and gave us the discharge papers. It was so nice to go home. The 3 of us cuddled on the couch and watched a very sad movie that helped in releasing all of my tears. :-)

So its finally over, and i am hoping for a very quick recovery for my little one.

In the waiting room before his procedure. He was a bit unsure of all that was going on.
His crib looked like a jail cell!




Making a funny face in his "coma"



Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Soon to come...

My next post will be my birth story. This week has been a little busy, so i haven't had much time to update... But here are some cute pictures that i've taken this week.
I hope they make you smile!











Monday, January 11, 2010

In My Arms


IN MY ARMS
Your baby blues
So full of wonder
Your curly cues
Your contagious smile
And as I watch
You start to grow up
All I can do is hold you tight


Knowing…
Clouds will rage and
Storms will race
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash around
But you will be safe in my arms


Story books
Full of fairy tales
Of kings and queens
And the bluest skies
My heart is torn
Just in knowing
You’ll someday see
The truth from lies


When the clouds will rage and
Storms will race
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash around
But you will be safe in my arms


Castles they might crumble
Dreams may not come true
But you are never all alone
Cos I will always
Always love you


When the clouds will rage and
Storms will race and
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash around
But you will be safe in my arms
In my arms

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Milestones

Last night Isaiah finally rolled over from his back onto his tummy! He made it look so easy. I cheered for him and he started to laugh as if he understood his great accomplishment. I am so proud of him!
I just love his little personality, and how happy he always seems to be. When we are at home he becomes so active, as all little boys should be. When we are out and about he tends to be more withdrawn and busies himself by "blowing raspberries" or smacking his lips. I'm glad that he is so easily amused. It makes it for a very pleasant experience whenever we go out together. I just love my little bundle of fun!

On top of rolling over last night, he has also been teething for a while now. My poor little guy gets so cuddly when he is in pain. Today when i was at the health food store i picked up some all natural Teething Pellets. When we got home i decided to try them out, and when i was rubbing it onto his gums.. i felt it! His very first tooth! I couldn't believe it! You can even see it beginning to emerge! I know, i know... your probably thinking "its just a tooth", but its just been so amazing to me to be able to witness a life changing so fast before my eyes. The love i feel for Isaiah is so natural to me that i can't help but be ecstatic over his little accomplishments. Besides, who wouldn't want someone cheering for them every step of the way?
After dinner, and his bath he is now sound asleep... and i am hoping he gets a good nights rest, for both our sakes. Being a mommy may be fun, but it sure is hard work as well!

Goodnight!

Just for laughs!

Friday, January 8, 2010

bon appétit!

So i am currently living a Fat Free lifestyle, and to me the word "lifestyle" really fits.
During my pregnancy i began to experience gall bladder attacks, which are very painful. At first i wasn't sure as to what was going on, but i ruled it out as an allergic reaction to certain foods.
After Isaiah's birth, these attacks became a lot more severe and frequent. When he was 2 weeks old i ended up going to the ER twice because the pain had gotten so bad. They referred me to a surgeon and gave me a strict non-fat diet program that i needed to follow very scrupulously.
I scheduled an appointment for surgery in November, but because of many variables that unexpectedly came up i needed to change it. So as of now, i don't have another date set up and it has already been almost 6 months now that i have had to only eat foods with no fat in them. A part of me was really dreading the holidays, because lets agree that one of the most exciting things about the holidays is the eating part. Avoiding the delicious looking deserts wasn't as hard as i thought it would be. The hard part was just finding anything to eat at all!
During the summer and early fall i was able to eat a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, but now with it all looking pretty dried out in the grocery store i have had to come up with some other alternatives. My mother-in-law found me a Non-Fat Cook book, that i have used so much! I have actually been able to make myself some pretty decent meals and enjoy them. One of the biggest benefits from this diet is that i have finally learned to cook, and absolutely enjoy it! My husband can attest to the fact that i am on my way to becoming the next healthy version of Julia Child. When we first got married i didn't even know how to boil water... pretty pathetic, i know! I blame it on the fact that i was always the one setting the table when i was growing up, and never allowed in the kitchen except for when i had to clean the dishes. Now i make pretty much everything from scratch, and can easily substitute many things for a non fat version. A part of me wishes that i could turn it into some type of career later on, but that will come in its own timing.
There have definitely been some major downfalls to this as well. At Isaiah's 4 month checkup the doctor seemed pretty concerned about his weight. He had gone from the 50th percentile down to the 25th in just 2 months and was showing signs of some allergies. I was exclusively breast feeding, and it was going so well, except for the fact that Isaiah was getting no fat from me. So the doctor gave me a few options of what to do and i chose to begin giving him rice cereal in the morning and evening and to mix in some formula with it. It was very disappointing to me because i promised myself that i wouldn't ever give any of my children formula because nursing is so much more beneficial to them. In Isaiah's case though i understand that it has become necessary for his proper growth. Anyways, he is doing really well, and slowly gaining back his weight.
Me, on the other hand is starving! I feel like i need to be constantly eating, especially because i am still breast feeding and losing calories all day long. I'm nervous to do any sort of exercise because i am afraid to lose any more weight than i already have. I am feeling weak, tired, and just generally unwell. Which is the complete opposite of how i felt during my pregnancy! I had never felt better in my life! I felt so healthy and energetic, and got so much done during those 9 months! I amazed myself! I just want that back, i want to feel healthy again, i want to feel full!
So anyways, i am hoping to schedule an appointment for sometime in February. I'm just getting a little nervous about the preparation of having to pump for Isaiah, and not being able to do much for him for a couple weeks. He still is not sleeping through the night, which is fine with me, but will make it difficult for whomever is getting up with him during my recovery. I just never thought i would be having surgery at such a young age... but i guess i never thought i would have gotten married, or had a baby at such a young age either.
I just need to trust that God is going to take care of everything and that Isaiah will be in good hands.
I am very thankful that this is a fixable problem, and that i will be able to enjoy sharing a meal with my family, or going out to dinner! I do still plan to live a very healthy lifestyle, and i find myself feeling very passionate about it, but i'm looking forward to the freedom to indulge myself every once in a while with a treat.
So thats what i mean when i say i'm living a Fat Free Lifestyle.. because it sure feels like it to me!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Holidays

This past month seems to be going by a lot slower than the previous 4 months. Which is strange because its been filled to the rim with the Holidays. It just seems to me that Isaiah has been 5 months old for a while now, and i don't want it to end. There is a strange feeling inside me that does not anticipate him turning 6 months. It means half a year has gone by since that beautiful day that he came into this world. On top of that, it is only 6 months away that he will be turning one. How quickly time flies when you only want it to slow down. It always bothers me when people say things like that. "You'll blink and he will be going off to college" "Tomorrow you'll wake up and he will already be 5" "Time slips away from you when you start having kids".... 


I just don't want to forget anything. I wish so badly that i could go back to certain days and moments that i shared with Isaiah. I know he wont remember them, so i feel an even bigger need to remember them myself. Somehow pictures and video's don't seem enough at times. I want to be able to feel his tiny body floating in my arms, and his head resting so carelessly on my chest when he was first born. 
I can see now why some people choose to have lots of children. For many reasons i'm sure, but one of them is most likely to feel that awesome wonder and amazement the day your precious child joins you for the first time, grasps your finger with his frail ones, or lets out that first tiny shout of joy. How amazing God is to create such a miracle!


Isaiah has been the most overwhelming gift God has ever given me. Isaiah is full of contagious joy and curiosity. I don't think i could ever ask anything more from God.


Honestly though i feel so grateful to have such an easy and well tempered baby. He can be a little shy, which i'm sure he got from me, but i know that he is constantly taking the world in, and exploring things with his eyes. He has given me so much happiness!